Hindsight (76 days)
After such a disastrous Sunday run, I tied on my old takkies/trainers, (not the ones I normally run in- after reading my Marathon Handbook over the weekend- need to mix these thing up apparently) after a long day and late night at work (including my job interview for another job internally) and off I went for a 6 mile run, by myself. Matt, carefully esconsced on the sofa with Mac, mommy-cat, was left behind while I ran past the frozen puddles with a dripping nose and an ipod that also froze and wouldn’t play- not too bad as I was getting very irate with the earphones falling out anyway, but wanting to listen to some music to clear the cobwebs was not to be. I would love to report about an amazing time, or my continuous athletic run, but I can’t. I stopped several times, I bitched at myself but at least I didn’t turn around and always restarted running.
I thought of a list of Matt vs Me. The difference between the average human and the achiever (me being human), how I will find a shortcut even if it is my choice to go for a run, even though no-one is watching or even when someone is watching, which is an irony because there is no point in shortcuts in an exercise such as training for a marathon. Then I was thinking that as soon as I get back from skiing next week I’ll start getting in to work early. Training every lunch and running at least 3 times a week in the evening and once on the weekend…. For all my jokes and quips, I am at some point going to have to find another source of sustenance other than chocolate and potatoes… There are loads of people who manage this life balance and much much more.
Then my ultimate life lesson kicks in and I remember that my biggest archilles heel is this constant comparison- part of the package deal of being born the youngest. There is no comparision between people. In any context. Stats lie or at best, misconstrue. The only person I am running against is myself. It’s great to early on pop your head above the parapet and identify where your ultimate destination should be (the London Marathon) but then it is much more efficient to put your head back down and just get on with it. Checking where you are and who is still with you- who you are ahead of and who you are behind, is irrelevant when the task is just to reach the immovable and constant end point. It is much, much more productive to just focus on what you are doing and only when something goes wrong do you need to reevaluate (like a leg falling off-still googling it). So, I’m pretty sure that is a jail break idea.
I know where I am going so now I just am going to stop focusing on the marathon and start focusing on every run. Every run will be my mini- marathon and I will get me some decent earphones. (Also, advice to mix up your trainers/ takkies is NOT true- my knees, ankles were in agony!)
I’m out for Chris and Bron’s one year anniversary dinner tonight- Gauchos!!!! Yum, steak! So I’ll write again tomorrow and report on my miraculous transformation. In the meantime, all advice is welcome and all the support you send me via comments and emails really help me stay on track- if I hadn’t been writing this blog I really would have found some shortcut out of this already! xx